OSCAR ATE MY MUFFIN

Wicked Wonderful Autumn (Part 1)

Kicking off this first feature, from a whole week (stay tuned!) of autumn-inspired posts (brought to you by the letter "W"!) we'd be remiss if we didn't launch out of the gate directly into the changing leaves of the New England deciduous forest. Because let's be honest - there's nothing quite like it.

Oscar always adores a good stroll through the woods, but the transformation that takes place this time of year - the one that warms even the chilliest air with the glow of cadmium orange and schoolbus yellow, and that fills your nostrils with the sweet, earthy scent of decaying vegetation - it's a scene that makes us both honest to goodness okay with the passing of summer. You know the feeling, and you can't help but love it. We'll take "Wandering Woods Walks" FTW.

Dress Up Day With Forêt

Saturday mornings are made for leisurly strolls - and what better destination for a weekend spin than a pop-up farmer's market inside a handsome Anthropologie store in Harvard Square? Last Saturday that's straight where we headed, and despite tables of enticing nibbles made by local foodie superstars, Oscar navigated a thick crowd with me in order to say hello to some of his favorite Fringe studio-mates: the lovely ladies of Forêt.

Forêt floral design studio creates bespoke arrangements (of the jaw-droppingly gorgeous kind) for all manner of events; they also make regular appearances at local markets and maker fairs, where they sell bundles of blooms, boutonieres, wreaths, garlands and this past Saturday - floral crowns. That's right - gone is the day when a flower crown meant a bright yellow braid of sticky dandilion stems... Erin and Rose (the "ladies" in "ladies of Forêt") are bringing Pretty back, one fresh accessory at a time, and on this particular day their handiwork took the form of winterberry constellations twisting through evergreen sprigs... and I couldn't resist.

While it's true that Oscar will put up with some truly undignified games of dress-up, the only headwear that stands even a partial chance of staying put on his sleek noggin needs to be tied down something fierce - definintely not the best arrangement for a delicate chain of plant limbs. Lucky for us, dog necks make far more appropriate (and much less ridiculous) locations for adornment, so we turned our floral crown into a custom collar -> Pretty problem solved.




Sorry, sweet boy, so much for dignity... (at least there were french fried rewards at the end of this torture - that's a fair trade, right?!).

Woods Walks With Wee Friends

What better way to start a Saturday morning than with an early-hour woods walk! OK, truth be told, I reeeeeally wanted a few more hours of sleep today... but I had some inexplicably chipper outside influence urging the Beast and I out of the house and into the car, and yes, you bet it was worth it in the end. What was it that made today special (and warranted the acceptance of a temporary sleep defecit)? Today's sun-shiny, pre-breakie field trip was made with the loveliest of friends - one of whom is Oscar's bestie: Cosmo Porkchop St. Pierre. Yup, that's quite a name... for a chihuahua... but this Wee Beast OWNS it.



O-Town and CosmoTron are both studio dogs, so they see each other reguarly "at the office". Encounters usually consist of Cosmo reservedly peeking his snout around the corner of my space, causing Oscar to prance forward into a hulking play bow... which sends Cosmo skittering back towards his space, growling all the way (lest he be the recipient of a canine dope slap to the noggin).

I like to think these two pups are "friends", but it's probably more accurate to just say they tolerate each other. On days like today, in wide open spaces, they rather conspicuously carry on as if the other were simply not there. This is a perfectly acceptible situation, but not one you would expect would lead to Cosmo donning a birthday hat decorated with a bright red "O" this past March... and yet, he did. Why? Because he's a dog. And when you don't have the neurons for extensive comprehnsion, and your crafty mamma says it's party time - you wear the paper hat and humor your human in the hope that it leads to a treat...

A Big Red Dog Meets the Giant of Boston

Last summer a mural went up on the Rose Kennedy Greenway, just next door to South Station. Created by the twin Brazilian street artists known as Os Gemeos, the work covers the entire 70 x 70' asymmetrical end of a Big Dig ventilation building and was erected in conjunction with a first ever solo show here in Boston. The ICA has long since moved on to other artists, and it took us until just this past February to pay the outdoor installation a visit, but I can safely report - it's one of the most beautiful, breath-taking pieces of art I've ever seen. Maybe it was the contrast of a vibratingly bright jam of colors against the dull grey skies that day, maybe it was the mural's sheer size and perfect framing by the surrounding city towers - whatever the combination, this epic urban friend literally stopped me in my tracks. Oscar, oblivious, but a true sport, squinted against icy precipitation just long enough to capture a portrait before trudging over to a trash can for a quick pee.

Dubbed "The Giant of Boston" the massive reclining figure is rendered in quintessential Os Gemeos style, with it's canary-yellow skin, eclectically patterned "pajamas", and shrouded head. One needn't look hard to see a history of similar characters throughout the Twins internationally recognized urban art, yet the mural still caused quite a silly fuss directly after it's completion... (Boston, c'mon). 

*The Giant of Boston will only be up until November of 2013 - if you can swing it, we highly recommend you pay this beauty a visit yourself...

And regardless of controversy, Oscar and I are indisputable fans...

Labors of a Country Dog

Little known fact: Oscar - the dog who can't bear damp pavement after a rain - is obsessed with wallowing belly-deep in the mud and shallows of small ponds. Why? In a word: FROGS. I'm not sure he even knows what a frog looks like, but their periodic chirps and darting out of invisible hiding spots is enough to ignite his tiny predator's brain, and he'll slog through some pretty disgusting goop - like a BOSS - just to stand... and wait... and splash... and stand and wait again. He simply adores it. Go figure.

This past sunshiney Labor Day the Beast lucked out and found himself in VT, a mere 10 min walk from his favorite soupy mess of an amphibian safari. And slop about he did... I don't love the doggie-deep-clean I must oversee at the end of these walks, but watching him so enthusiastically riveted - hound ears pricked, head canting from side the side, tail erect and wagging all the while - is more than worth a 15 minute hose-down on the front lawn.

Newbury Playday, Part 2: Best In Show

What does one do when, while out for a stroll with your dog, you encounter a giant steel sculpture in the silhouette of a Retriever at attention? Well, for this girl it's a no-brainer - you (poorly) stack your beast right in front of said sculpture and snap a photo... Oscar is looking dreadfully wilted in the heat, but he still attracted a small crowd, which fanned out behind me with their camera phones to take the same picture I was. Ha.

The massive metal sidewalk dog is the work of Haverhill sculptor Dale Rogers (from his "American Dog" series) and it marked the entrance to the Lanoue Fine Art Gallery, at 125 Newbury St. Coincidentally, on one of Oscar's very rare strolls through Boston, the Lanoue was filled with artworks... wait for it... celebrating DOGS! The exhibit, titled "Best in Show", included a spectrum of contemporary artists, including work from current dog-photog darling, Seth Casteel (of "Underwater Dogs" fame), and the grand master of clever canine portraiture himself, William Wegman.
 
Below, clockwise: "Youngster", by William Wegman; Oscar hide+seeking behind a smaller version of Dale Rogers' "American Dog"; "The Fly", by William Wegman; and Oscar next to Emil Alzamora's "Flying Lessons".


Wegman has been a favorite of mine forever and a day, and it was a treat to see some prints in person. It was also an inspiration... but rather than do a 1 for 1 homage using my camera, I decided to keep to the illustrated theme on this blog and ink a portrait, pulled from a Wegman-esque world. If we're dressing up the dogs, there's probably no better kind of human for Oscar to test-drive for a day than a baker... so onto the body of Julia Child his great block-head went! (Observation: when you're mix-matching dog's heads and people-bodies - kind of like when you're doing the same with hair styles - aligning gender across species becomes moot... The Beast rocks a pink button-down, right?!)

Below: the cover of an exhibition catalogue from a comprehensive 2012 show of Wegman's photos, drawings and paintings, held at Bowdoin College, titled "Hello Nature"; a Wegman Dog Chef; and Oscar, cooking up a storm like a pro (in fantasy-land, I'd let him eat it all too!).


Of course any post that alludes to dogs testing their baking chops in the kitchen really wouldn't be complete without including this classic clip from Sesame Street, which follows a pair of Wegman hounds through an adventure in bread-baking... Stay hungry, stay happy, friends...

Newbury Playday, Part 1: Fish & Bone

When appropriate, I like to bring Oscar along for window-shopping walks. He's a bit of a people magnet, and enjoys the attention; he's patient, and curious, and predictably jazzed by the bouquet of freshly changing smells that bathe the heavily trafficked streets of a popular retail strip. A few weekends ago, the Beast and I again ventured across the river to the sunny hum of Newbury Street. And whether I had planned to stop in or not, as soon as O-Town's sniffer passed the "never-ending treat can" tied to the wrought-iron railing in front of pet boutique Fish & Bone, it was decided: we were going inside - and we weren't coming out empty handed.

Fish & Bone is owned by the charming Kathy Palmer, and is the younger, southern sibling of pet supply outpost Fetch, in Portland, ME. Fish & Bone's Newbury location does not boast a heap of square-footage, but what space there is positively overflows with bright, unique, tastefully designed, and meticulously sourced product: collars, leads, stuffies and chewies take up much of the front, while a nom-nom nook towards the back teems with healthy food options, for dogs and cats alike - at least that's what it looked like - we only really made it as far as the á la carte canine treat display...

While Oscar busied himself investigating a bucket of antler chews and pigs ears, I went to work filling a small paper bag with an assortment of novel yet wholesome looking treats from the neatly organized self-serve treat shelf. Each treat type* was labeled in it's own giant, glass, lidded jar, and with names like "Lamb Wonder Wieners" and "Philly Cheesesteak Meatballs", I couldn't help but grab one of each.

*I'm pretty certain Oscar can detect the flavor nuances between venison jerky and chicken crunchers, what I'm not certain of is whether he gives two shakes about diversity (this is the dog that inhales paper wrappers if they so much as smell like they once swaddled a muffin). All things considered, if I can read into excessive drool and an unusually hasty attention to commands as any indication of "like", I'd say each all-natural, no preservative little nugget has so far been a home run in the flavor department. Below, a selection of the varietous treat-scape you can expect to find on the Fish & Bone shelves...
 
Of course every Beast becomes an angel when there is good food to be had... and there was no shortage of good eats for this dog at Fish & Bone. From the company website:

Throughout the years our mission has remained the same: to improve the quality of life of animals and their people with healthy natural diets & other edibles, a great selection of gear, a depth of knowledge in a creative atmosphere, and a spirit of good fun… and to support animal welfare, the arts and the environment along the way.

Our thanks to Kathy and the sweet staff at Fish & Bone for making an impromptu Saturday pit stop such a thoroughly enjoyable affair. We'll surely be back - and we'll bring a bigger shopping bag next time!

Sleepy Softball Mascot

Weekends in the summer at Mayor Danehy Park equal gametime. It's generally an across the board affair, with little kippers swinging at tee-balls in one corner, swaggering men's softball leagues in another corner, and the occassional highly entertaining cricket match in between. Oscar and I usually weave in-between the team sports on our way to the tall grasses and marshy bits (where all the park rabbits leave delicious trails to follow), but this Sunday morning we were invited into a hallowed dugout to cheer on our very own - team Fringe Union was a proud participant in the Gentle Giant Moving Co.'s 2012 chairity softball event (to benefit Groundwork Somerville), and sweet Budweiser before 11am, they played to WIN. Seriously. They killed it, defeating FOUR teams before retiring to the BBQ tent to nurse their abraded shins and watch the final rounds form the sideline. JOB. WELL. DONE.

Oscar took his job as impromptu team mascot very seriously, boosting player morale with nuzzles and giant, not-great-smelling dog kisses. He was, no doubt, overjoyed at being in the b-ball field's special chainlink nook when there were real live rounds of food being offered up (sweet, sweeeet local doughnuts) since this favorite spot is typically only littered with wrappers and empty paper plates by the time we cruise through in the evenings... *lots of divine smells, but only random scores of discarded food itself.

To the Beast's discontent, the pastries were not shared... and without deep-fat-fried sustinence, there was little left for this dog to do but sack out in the grass and hope a foul ball didn't sail in his direction. 

Reaching New Depths of Lazy

I've alluded to Oscar's intense distaste for physical exertion before, but taking the last 5 or so years of his indolence into account now, I must report - he may have just hit rock bottom.

You know you have a lazy dog when traffic stops to worriedly ask you if your dog is ill - or dead - and if you need any help... Yep. That happened last week (and no, it was not because my dog was ill, or for goodness sake dead).


It's quite routine for the Beast to take at least one 'lay-down break' on a grassy patch during any summer walkie (FACT: heat increases propensity for laziness). I don't mind if I've got the time to sit (bless you, my hand-held mobile office device), but I prefer said grassy patches to be on quiet side streets, preferably with nice landscaping and prim Cambridge homes to admire. Last week, Oscar had other plans. He lost his will to walk one step further before we had even made it off the main drag. Not only did he succumb to the toil of plodding along on a median, of all places, but in the great flop onto his side, a portion of his rear actually flopped off the curb, leaving his back legs jutting off into the road. Cripes. I'm not sure he even noticed this detail, he just shut his eyes, stretched out long, and exhaled into the great unrousable lump that is Oscar on siesta. And indeed, no fewer than 3 vehicles hastened to a stop on their way by, offering assistance for my clearly ailing animal... My thanks and apologies to those kind folks - hand over my heart, we were not pulling any pranks. *How amazing is the placement of the orange street markings in the above photos?! The dog couldn't have planned that better if he had tried...

I've been meaning to do a little series of the signature "Oscar Flop" - now would seem a fitting occassion. This isn't your typical 'hind-end first into a sit, ease down into a lying position' kind of move, it's rather like the Beast just runs aground, mid-step - buckling in the front, face down then shoved forward from the back, ending with a proper keeling over sideways (which results in the audible "flop" of a rather lot of dog hitting the ground). Like so:


Once down, a 95lb creature is surprisingly difficult to get up - when there is protest, you end up with a tantrum on the ground in front of you: there's rolling and kicking and mouthing your hands - there's groaning and whining and backtalk, while he can. It's horribly amusing, and I *shouldn't* let him get away with it, I know - but we have an understanding, he and I - this is an exception to a great many rules...

That said, a lazier beast I have yet to meet.

Oscar Incognito

Ever heard the quote: "Lord, help me be the person my dog thinks I am."? Ahem. If I were any more the person my dog knows I am, there would be a rubber room in my future, for sure. He and I both know exactly what brand of crazy I am... and now, thanks to a lonely wig on a yard sale table, a lot of people I've never even met will know how crazy I am too. Awesome. (I assure you, Oscar suffered nothing but a dent in pride by trying on that emo bob...)

After a little wig Googling, human hair on a dog seemed a bit... obvious (right?). DOG hairstyles on a dog though... now THAT'S not something you see every day - I think Oscar wears em all surprisingly well too: